About Monty

Monty Munford has more than 15 years' experience in mobile, digital media, web and journalism. He is the founder of Mob76, a company that helps tech companies raise money and exit. He speaks regularly at global media events with a focus on Africa, writes a weekly column for The Telegraph, is a regular contributor to The Economist, Wired, Mashable and speaks regularly on the BBC World Service.

FIVE GOLD GIFTS: Tranya Rimor Wireless Headphones

Tranya Rimor wireless headphones provide an awesome auditory experience.

tranyaTranya Rimor sounds like a minor city in Transylvania, but is the brand name of an high-quality pair of wireless headphones.

Like many of its competitors in a crowded market, the Rimor has all the usual specifications to make listening to music and making phone calls an excellent experience.

Rimor uses a 10mm nano-ti coated dynamic driver to reproduce highly accurate and rich sounds. It apparently creates three times more detail than a typical 6mm driver, which prevent distortion.

With built-in industry-leading Realtek audio codec technology, it ensures high-speed transmission with significantly reduced latency and Rimor’s refined design with passive noise reduction blocks most background noises.

Both earbuds are easy to ‘install’ in the ear and left/right earbuds can be set to mono mode and stereo mode. This design also ensures better connectivity with both left/right earbud communicating with devices at the same time.

The Rimor supports up to eight-hour non-stop audio streaming on a single charge and the portable charging case provides four full recharges.

Retailing at around $80 (£63), they are not cheap compared to other earbuds, but the strength of quality makes this purchase an intelligent option. They are, quite literally, music to the ears and although they do fall out sometimes, especially when exercising, there has yet to be a similar product that can provide that. This website gives them a very solid 8.5/10.

Key features:

1. 10mm nano-ti coated dynamic driver (3x more detailed than a typical 6mm driver creates)
2. Realtek Bluetooth 5.0 audio codec technology (Chipset)
3. Passive noise cancellation
4. Dual-master design (it’s upgraded compared to master-slave design)
5. Up to 8-hour playtime per charge, and 40 hours in total with charging case
6. IPX5 water and sweat resistant
7. Light weight: each bud weighs only five grams
8. Type C charging
9. Fast charging: charge 10 minutes and can be used for 90 minutes

FIVE GOLD GIFTS – Tracy’s Dog Suction Vibrator

The Tracy Dog Suction Vibrator will put a smile on a lot of people’s faces this Christmas.


tracy
Father Christmas only comes once a year and when he does, he fills your stocking is a risqué phrase that many a market trader has yelled from his stall. With this gift, thowever, there is no need for Father Christmas once he’s disappeared back up your chimney.

Tracy’s Dog Unique Clit Suction Vibrator may have hidden meanings this writer will never know, but it is likely to make many wives and girlfriends less lonely this Christmas.

Tracy’s Dog focuses on clitoris-sucking vibration, not penetration. According to the company (and many woman this writer knows), 80% of the women don’t orgasm from penetrative sex, so some good market research there.

The vibrator comes in a discreet package and is made out of ‘body-safe’ silicone and features an elegant, waterproof design. Moreover, it doesn’t require batteries but instead is charged via USB; probably not a priority for users, but useful to know.

It is also a very different gift to the one previously reviewed for this section.

It works for 60 minutes(!) at a full charge and the company says it is ideal for beginners. It has ten vibration patterns and its sucking function has ten intensity levels. The company also says that it creates ‘I died and met Jesus’ orgasms; not something you usually associate with the Nativity.

Now, I can’t vouch for this product personally, but I do know women who literally swear by this product (usually at the height of their climaxes). In a time of great uncertainty, when global warming threatens us all and 2020 may bring all types of changes, it’s clear that some things will never change.

At top of that list is sex and pleasure. People always love sex and pleasure. For many people sex and pleasure is all they have, so vibrate away. Nobody wants a Father Christmas who only comes once a year. The Tracy Dog promises so much more.

FIVE GOLD GIFTS… Lumie Bodyclock luxe 750DAB

This alarm clock is not cheap, but looks good, tells the time and has a great radio

lumieThe alarm clock has changed over the past 20 years and instead of being woken by a monstrosity of bells and an unwieldy device, it’s generally our mobile phones that awaken us.

These ringtones from our phone have also changed. No longer are we woken abruptly as if we have to go down the pit, the very nature of our jobs, especially knowledge workers, is to be awoken by something more benign and chilled; something that makes us love the morning, not despise its very meaning.

So welcome to the Lumie Bodyclock luxe 750DAB, a sexy little piece of kit that looks like it comes from the future, but with a functionality that belongs to the past (in a good way).

Like all tech devices nowadays, it takes time to set it up, the four frontal buttons are a little difficult to control, but once the basics have been done, the Bodyclock really does seem as onomatopoeic as it sounds.

It’s so much nicer listening to the radio when trying to nod off to sleep, knowing that you will be in the clouds with the sheep before the radio turns itself off, it makes insomnia a stranger and that’s a very good thing.

The alarms are also wondrous. There are swatches to choose from and if you prefer falling rain and natural birdsong to bells and whistles, then your (recently awoken) dreams have all come true with a duration from 15 to 90 minutes. One tap to send to snooze.

The Lumie also uses fully dimmable bedroom lighting using mixed LEDs to mimic the colours of a real sunrise/sunset. It also has hiigh quality Bluetooth speakers, DAB radio and more than sleep and wake sounds with a seven-day alarm setting. It also claims to treat SAD and those winter blues.

It’s not cheap at £199.99, but it will last a lifetime and that will be a lifetime of dreams that are not shattered, but filled with a longing for the morning, brought alive by sounds that almost replicate Circadian rhythms. Sleep well!

BOOK REVIEW – Chasing Black Unicorns by Marek Zmysłowski

Marek Zmysłowski is an amazing entrepreneur who has written a real-life thriller based on his career in Poland and, most intriguingly, Africa.

Zmysłowski

I have met Marek Zmysłowski twice in Africa and, more recently, in London. The nights we had in Johannesburg and Lagos were legendary, but a gentleman never tells.

He is a Polish firebrand and whirlwind, driven by entrepreneurial zeal and loves life almost as much as I loved his book, Chasing Black Unicorns.

They say that there is a book inside every journalist… and that’s where it should stay. I would also say that there’s a book inside every entrepreneur and that’s where it should be buried, but not in this case.

This story is more like a Robert Ludlum African-based thriller and it rolls and rolls like an exciting rollercoaster.

It begins slowly with a young Zmysłowsk dreaming of big things in a small Polish town. His ambition knows no bounds as he chases the zloty and dollar by working in finance and, memorably, in the funeral business. He spends what he earns and he loves spending as his internet pioneering makes him a Polish player.

Then an opportunity arises with Rocket Internet to set up the ‘African equivalent of Expedia’ in Nigeria. Zmysłowsk takes up the challenge and heads to Lagos and in the next couple of years does the almost-impossible in doing exactly that.

Then the problems begin. Agent provocateurs, dissembling investors, strategies-from-above and all of the above magnified by the chaos of Nigeria mean trouble for Zmysłowsk. Not only is he ousted from the business he built up, but his new venture is seen as a threat.

Before he knows it, he is on Interpol’s most wanted list and endures prison after being arrested at Warsaw airport expecting to be extradited to Nigeria.

I won’t spoil the ending because there is much to read and admire here. His writing is crisp and he never loses faith even when the Gods seem out to screw him over. His book is a hell of a ride, I recommend you join him. A really excellent story.

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