The Tracy Dog Suction Vibrator will put a smile on a lot of people’s faces this Christmas.

Father Christmas only comes once a year and when he does, he fills your stocking is a risqué phrase that many a market trader has yelled from his stall. With this gift, thowever, there is no need for Father Christmas once he’s disappeared back up your chimney.

Tracy’s Dog Unique Clit Suction Vibrator may have hidden meanings this writer will never know, but it is likely to make many wives and girlfriends less lonely this Christmas.

Tracy’s Dog focuses on clitoris-sucking vibration, not penetration. According to the company (and many woman this writer knows), 80% of the women don’t orgasm from penetrative sex, so some good market research there.

The vibrator comes in a discreet package and is made out of ‘body-safe’ silicone and features an elegant, waterproof design. Moreover, it doesn’t require batteries but instead is charged via USB; probably not a priority for users, but useful to know.

It is also a very different gift to the one previously reviewed for this section.

It works for 60 minutes(!) at a full charge and the company says it is ideal for beginners. It has ten vibration patterns and its sucking function has ten intensity levels. The company also says that it creates ‘I died and met Jesus’ orgasms; not something you usually associate with the Nativity.

Now, I can’t vouch for this product personally, but I do know women who literally swear by this product (usually at the height of their climaxes). In a time of great uncertainty, when global warming threatens us all and 2020 may bring all types of changes, it’s clear that some things will never change.

At top of that list is sex and pleasure. People always love sex and pleasure. For many people sex and pleasure is all they have, so vibrate away. Nobody wants a Father Christmas who only comes once a year. The Tracy Dog promises so much more.